Music is very important to me; I'm not very good as expressing what I'm thinking or feeling, so I use music to convey the feelings inside of me. Lately, music has taken a back seat - life is crazy! I'm a stressed college student, trying to do all my school work, work, fulfill church callings and obligations, trying (sort of) to have a social life, and sleep enough so I'm not a big crankypants. My piano skills have been sorely neglected and my guitar has been sitting in a corner, gathering dust. Choir has been keeping me sane; keeping me involved in music; keeping that love of music alive inside of me.
It was such a blessing, the day I decided to take choir instead of doing sports, like I had wanted to do for the first 15 years of my life. (When I was 8, it was my dream to become the first woman in Major League Baseball. Don't you dare laugh. If I had been on a team and had been trained, I would have been a stinkin' good player!) Do you know how different of a person I would have been without music? I would probably be a much angrier person; music has softened me, has made me into a gentler person. I would probably be even worse than I already am at expressing myself. Essentially, that fated day, when I made that decision, has forever changed my life. I call Divine Intervention on that one.
Today was my last day of choir for 2 years. And, maybe, my last day of choir for much, much longer than that. Except for institute choir. But, truthfully, that's not real...choir-y. This thought...has saddened me greatly. It was probably one of the saddest moments of my life. Honestly. Even though I have been neglecting music more than I should, even though I'm not the most musically talented, even though I don't know as much about music as a lot of other people, it is still very important to me - it's the feeling that music invokes, and the power it has to touch the hearts of people.
Music is a blessing. It's a gift from God. God loves music. He loves it when a person sings, even if they are not the best singer, and He especially loves it when we sing to glorify Him, to proclaim our testimony and love for Him. Choir has been such an important part of my life. It's what made my senior year of high school. My sophomore year of high school in choir made me remember why choir was so amazing, why I loved it so much. And last night, the last performance of Holiday Dinner (as much as I complained about it, every time I started singing, all my worries and complaints went away, as I was enveloped in the music) reminded me of why I sing! It reminded me of the power one has with music - which is why one must only listen to and participate in good, wholesome music. Last night, as we finished up our performance, I was thinking about how I wouldn't be taking choir for a couple of years. And I was just like, "Huh. Oh well. It was fun while it lasted." This morning, sitting in choir for the last time this semester, I was holding back tears the entire class period. Because I looked around at all the girls, and realized that I loved them so much. Even the ones that I'm pretty sure I've never spoken a word to. There's just a bond that is formed when you sing with someone. And the thought of not coming back, and not singing with them, not sharing those special moments with them. And, simply not being in a choir. It was a hard thing for me.
To close, I want to share this song that, several years ago, touched my heart. And expresses, quite well, my feelings towards music. It kinda became known as my song my senior year. It truly is fantastic. And, when I heard it, and truly listened to it for the first time, it changed the way I saw music.
Let music never die in me! Forever let my spirit sing! Let music live!
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