Life...and stuff

Welp, I've been super busy with school and homework and life. I had honest intentions to blog regularly. But since I have no clue how many people actually read this and since I have very little free time, I don't post as often as I originally planned. But, since I'm procrastinating my homework - my gimpy brother is watching TV anyway (He hurt his back so he has been sitting in the chair and watching TV for forever. And since he's a cripple, I must humor him.) - I decided to do a post. It's basically going to be a big jumbled mess. Which is typically what's going on in my brain, anyway.

So, this Friday, my sister is getting married. It's pretty awesome. Except it's kinda freaking me out, because she's three years older than me. Which means I that in three years I could be getting married. As much as I really want to get married, I'm am NOT ready for that.

Last Saturday was the Homecoming dance. It was lots of fun. I had a great group and a great date. Unfortunately, I didn't get to slow dance with him, because we were only there for one slow dance, and that ended up being the dance where all the Homecoming King and Queen nominees danced together. So I just kinda stood there awkwardly, until McKenna, being the sweetheart that she is, told her date to dance with me while she went to get a drink of water. So, I ended up dancing with my date's younger brother, Joseph! But, all in all, it was a fun night.

October Break was great - sorta. That was when my grandma died, but it was also Girls Camp. Let me tell you, being a YCL is one of the greatest experiences a person can have. I'm kind of a selfish person. But, for those few days, I dedicate myself to serving those girls that I'm over. I try my best to leave my wants out of the picture, and give myself up in service. And the relationship that is formed is amazing. I still consider some of the girls I was over last year as really good friends. In fact, one of them helped me a lot when I found out my grandma died. I just love them lots! When I think of Girls Camp, now, I picture the sweet faces of those girls I was over. And I miss them! It's hard not seeing them constantly like I did at camp. As a YCL, you learn how to love completely, how to see others as daughters of God, who are of great worth. It's been a couple of weeks, and I'm still thinking about and missing camp. But, the great thing about it, is that our stake youth activities are that much more fun, because I get to see everyone! Like softball this week! I'm so excited for that! Softball is possibly one of my favorite mutual activities.

Welp, I prolly should get to work. There's an unfortunate choir festival tonight that takes up half the night, which means less time for homework and such.

Thank you for the music - a tribute.

"Thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing
Thanks for all the joy they're bringing
Who can live without it, I ask in all honesty
What would life be?
Without a song or dance what are we?
So I say thank you for the music
For giving it to me"
-ABBA

This Girls Camp was...interesting, for the lack of a better word. Depending on the mood I am when you ask me, I might say it was my best, but I also might say it was my worst. There was just a lot that happened - but I do know all of it has potential to make me stronger.

The weekend before, my grandma Root had a massive stroke. She wasn't expected to live much longer. So, I went off to camp, telling my dad to call one of the leaders if she did happen to pass away. Monday night, the first night up there, a leader pulled me aside to tell me that Grandma wasn't doing well, and that my dad didn't think she'd last a whole lot longer. I was fine. A little sad, but I was expecting it. Then, Tuesday night, I was pulled aside again. This time, I was told that she passed away. And I was devastated.

The thing is, I was expecting it. And I know that her spirit is still living. I know that she's happier now - that she's finally reached her happily ever after (the camp theme). But, I was just completely and utterly devastated. I couldn't face anyone. The rest of the time there, I kept smiling and laughing only because of the girls around me. It's easy to smile for others, and then eventually the smile becomes real.

But, this isn't supposed to be about me - ok, I guess it is a tiny little bit. But this is about my grandma, and what she has done for me. She has given me one of the most wonderful gifts I could ever ask for: music. I was eight years old. My dream was to become the first woman in major league baseball. I planned on being in every sport possible in high school. I was a die-hard sports fan. Then, for Christmas, my grandma said she'd give me piano lessons. I knew a little bit - my mom had taught me a bit. But, basically all I could play was Mary Had a Little Lamb.

So, I learned piano. And, while I didn't exactly like practicing, or all the songs she assigned me to play, I grew to love playing. Once I got into Young Womens, I started learning hymns, and I loved it. I started attempting John Schmidt songs. I played for a niece's baptism. I learned to feel music, not just play it. Because of those piano lessons, I chose band and choir my 9th grade year over volleyball and softball. I gradually lost my athletic skills, because I wasn't working on them. Basically, the only sport I'm decent at now is softball.

Now, I'm wussy, hate exercising, hardly ever watch sports, but music has become my passion. I sing, play piano, am a former drummer/percussionist, and play a wee bit of guitar. I attempted to teach myself violin, but that lasted about a week - I'll prolly need lessons if I ever really want to learn. Music helps me survive life.

I've been going through a whole lot recently. Just struggling to get by - but hey, that's life! And, what's been helping me get through it, is music. I believe it has power to heal the soul. It invites the Spirit, it makes me happy, and I can put my everything into it, whenever I'm having a lousy day. I forget myself in the music. Music is a part of me. Music can also be used as service - a song unto the Lord, to invite the Spirit, to help others. And service makes me happy.

I don't know what would have happened if I never had those piano lessons. Would I be a hardcore athlete? Would I even be in choir? Would I love to run? (Running is something I really dislike doing.) Would I be the person I am now? I don't know, I honestly don't. So, I just want to say, Grandma, thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing. Thank you for the music, for giving it to me.

Homecoming? Why yeesss!

So, this morning, I wake up to my alarm at 6:00. I forgot to turn off my alarm. I get up anyway, since I had the SAT to go to. I change, but then fall alseep on the living room couch. Half an hour, my mom walks in, slightly confused to see me sprawled out on the couch. She then goes outside to turn the fountain on, but instead of coming back in, she yells, "Beth, why is the house TPed?" I was confused. I walked outside to see on the doormat:

Umm...sorry. It turned sideways...and I'm too lazy to try to fix it. Ya'll can read sideways, right? (Is anyone else confused by the random sun?) 

So I take down all...or most...of the toilet paper, and there were letters written one them. So, I ripped the letters off, arranged them to get this name:

So why is this one normal? Oh well. So yeah. Johnathan Speakman. Needless to say, I'm like ridiculously excited. I actually wasn't expecting to get asked. So getting asked by one of the nicest boys ever was a pleasant surprise. Hence the ridiculous excitement. It's going to be freakin' awesome.

In other news...since I haven't updated in, like, eternity...school has been stressful. There may be certain teachers *cough cough Garcia cough cough* that, if they happened to disappear, I wouldn't mind too much. Though I swear I would have nothing to do with it...

I've quit my job. I've been super stressed, and had been considering it for a little while. And then, my daddy's schedule got changed, so I have no ride. So, no more work! Which also means no more moolah.

Also, music is amazing. Not that you all didn't know that already. But, lately, it's something I've come to appreciate even more. (I know, I thought it was impossible too. But, hey! Miracles do happen!) I've started playing Olivia a little bit more often. I'm bringing her to Girls Camp this next week, for our singing trees song. And I'm kinda excited to show all the little 1st years I'm over this year how cool their YCL is. Because I can play the guitar. Yes, Olivia is my guitar. Here she is!

See! It turned again! but...it's almost better this way...perhaps...but yeah. This is Olivia the guitar. She's purty, isn't she? Technically, she's not mine. She's my brother's. But I just like to pretend she's mine.

So, yeah. That's been my life in a nutshell. Minus some stuff. Like how I considered dropping A Cappella, (long story, but no worries, it's not gonna happen) and how I went to my sister, Amy's, bridal shower and bachelorette party - in less than three weeks, she'll be married! And a few other minor details.But, it's been...life! I'm just plugging through it.

Well, that's it for now. When I get back from girls camp, I'll prolly share some stuff about it. And I'll try to post more often. As long as I don't get too lazy...haha. :)