Dreams

I've been thinking about psychology a lot recently. I don't really know why...it couldn't possibly be because that's what I'm majoring in and I had to fight to get put into my developmental psych class instead of lame psych 101. But, really. I'm getting really excited for school to start. Part of that is because of my psych class. the other part is getting to do choir again.

Anyways. Psychology. One of the standard questions for people to ask you up here, if they don't know you and find out you're going to college: "What's your major?" The next question: "What do you want to do with that?" Every time I answer that question, the desire to actually do it is renewed in me. It strengthens my resolve to do it. I decided  that it's something I want to try to do even when/if I have a family of my own.

So what do I want to do with my psych major? I want to go through LDS church services, and become a psychologist/therapist/counselor/whatever-you-want-to-call-it for children and teens. Every time I've told someone who actually has experience or has dealt with psychologists in church services, they seem to think it's the best idea ever.

This is just something I feel so strongly about. For a little while, I was concerned that the only reason why I chose psych was because that's what my sister Amy is doing. Ever since I was little, I had this tendency to like whatever she liked/try to do what she did. (Except I played sports (sorta) and she didn't. And she did violin while I played the drums/percussion.) So I was worried that maybe my motives weren't what I thought they were. But then I thought back  on the day I made the decision to change my major. It was really random. I had this idea in my head of what my life was going to be. I was going to major in music education. After I finished my first four years of college, I was going to get married - if that for some reason didn't happen, then I would become a music teacher. (I still hadn't decided on choir or band yet.) If I did get married, I would become a private music teacher, so I could make some money on the side of whatever my husband was making. It seemed like the perfect plan to me. But, then, I started talking to my sister, Christina. In this conversation, I started thinking/talking about how I wanted to help people - my ultimate goal in life is to make a difference in the world. And I started thinking about some of the things I've gone through. Not exactly big things, but maybe some things that could have effect me worse. And the only reason why they didn't effect me worse was because of the Gospel in my life and how it has taught me to have a good relationship with my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. It has taught me to cope and to be happy, even in the midst of trials. Then I had the realization: The Gospel is the best therapy there is. And there it was. I suddenly had the desire to use my knowledge of the Gospel to help other people get though their own trials and be happy. Church services plus a knowledge of psychology could help make this possible. So, that's been my plan for about one and a half years, maybe two.

Will this change? Maybe. Plans change. But the best way to change you plans is while your chasing your dreams. Because you never know if that dream is right for you, unless you go after it. And sometimes those dreams change...but that's ok. My dreams right now include getting married (eventually), getting enough schooling done to become a psychologist, being a good mom, making people happy, and, of course, making a difference in the world. Everything I do right now is in attempts to achieve those dreams.

What are your dreams? What's important to you? What will you do to chase your dreams?

I'm going to leave you with this picture:

There is no purpose for this picture. I just felt like showing it. The end.

Flagstaffness

In the movie I Am Number Four, there's this quote. "A place is only as good as the people you know in it."

As time goes on, I settle more and more in. I've been here for over a month - about a month and a half. Crazy stuff. I feel like I've grown SO much in this past month and a half. And it hasn't even been that difficult - minus the first week, but I try to ignore that week. In fact, it's been so easy that I'm a wee bit afraid for what the Lord has in store for me...the calm before the storm is what I feel like I'm experiencing.

Anyways. I've gotten really comfortable up here. I just love the people I'm around. For the days that I was roommateless, I had to go out of my shell a little bit - it probably was really good for me. I'm still not like super outgoing - I'm almost never outgoing. But I'm not staying in the apartment all the time. I'm going out of my bubble a bit. In fact, I've gotten super sarcastic again. So sarcastic, in fact, that I'm afraid of being too mean. But I've told people to hit me if I get to mean. And this sarcasm is just proof that I'm comfortable up here and the people that I'm around.

Flagstaff has become to feel like home. And all because the people are wonderful. They're welcoming, loving, kind, and hilarious. I'm still missing my friends and family. It comes in waves. It's been particularly strong the past few days, but at the same time, I'm realized just how blessed I am by the people I'm surrounded by. So...I'm missing people, but I'm not sad about it. Because my friends up here are just as amazing as those in Mesa.

Flagstaff is...amazing. I truly am blessed to call this place home, for how ever long or short my stay is. I can't believe how everything has fallen into place. My job is great (boring for the time being, but great). I see my sister and brother in law basically everyday. I hang out with friends everyday. And I. Am. Happy. What more could I ask for?

ps. In like the past week and a half I've gotten three letters/cards. Every time my day was made. You want to make this chica happy? Send her a letter. Yes I'm pathetic enough to ask for letters on my blog. Don't judge me! :) I mostly just love letters.

To those who came before me

To those who came before me in seasons long ago 
To those who are the loved-ones that I have yet to know 
To those whose noble names I bear, whose light within me burns 
To them in gratitude shall my heart be turned 

To those whose lives of courage prepared the way for me 
Whose works became my heritage, whose harvest I may reap 
Who left for me a legacy that I have yet to earn 
To them in gratitude shall my heart be turned 

To those who came before me in days and years long past 
To those who are the family that I shall know at last 
Who laid a sure foundation for the truth that I have learned 
To them in gratitude shall my heart be turned 

  - Sally Deford

Today is Pioneer Day. Most people outside of the LDS faith have no clue what this is. This is the day we celebrate and show gratitude for those who crossed the plains and went into the Rockie mountains, to escape persecution and establish a place to worship freely. This is the reason that Utah, especially Salt Lake City, is Mormon Central - Mormons have lived there for over 100 years!

They suffered so much for us. I have ancestors who were pioneers. Some even helped settle Arizona, and some old buildings still have bricks made by them. Because of these wonderful people, I am who I am today, I live where I live today. I'm around the people that I am today. I am this person:

Beth Ann Root. A mostly happy soul and a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

But...there are many kinds of pioneers, not just those who crossed the plains so many years ago. Each and every one of us have ancestors, people who have come before us, who have left a legacy for us. Because of them, we are who we are today. Think about them, and what they had to suffer - because I can guarantee they did suffer!

Something I've recently been thinking about, is the legacy I'm leaving. I think about my family - the legacy my parents will be leaving.

It's not just a huge amount of family that's their legacy (this isn't even all of us!) It's what they've taught us - and those around them! It's the example they've been, the people they've influenced. The testimony they've instilled in their children and the people they've taught.

So, what is my legacy going to be? I don't have a family that I lead yet. But I have the family in the above picture. What have I done within it to create a legacy worth remembering. What about this family?:

My Chamber family. What have I done that will mean something to my friends and those around me and they will remember, that will somehow be passed down to future generations? Is my life going to mean something to someone? Or will it be completely pointless?

So....what kind of legacy are you leaving? Think about the people in the past that you look up to - to those who came before you. What was it that they did that you look up to so much? I'm sure that when they were doing it, they didn't expect it to effect a person in the far present. They were doing what they thought was right. I believe the way to leave a legacy is to do just that. Live the way you think is right - not falter or changing because of fear. Just be you, and you will change the life of someone, if not multiple people around you, and you WILL leave a legacy. On this day, I think about those who came before me, and how strong  they were, and how faithful they were. And I strive to become as they were.

Squirrels, chipmunks, and ducks

I realized that it's been a week since I last posted. I know. Shocking. Could it be that I actually have a...life?! I know. Shocking. I was walking home from institute with my friend Erika Tenney when I had the sudden realization about this. So I asked her what I should do a post about. Her reply: "Squirrels, chipmunks, and ducks. But mostly chipmunks and ducks." Instead, I think...I'm going to blog about Erika, if you guys don't mind.

Ok. Here's the deal. There's LOTS I could be telling you about. Like how I have a job now. How I thought I would be roommateless for the week (but then Whitney showed up last night. I like not being the only one in the apartment). How I saw Harry Potter yesterday for freeeeee! How I've had an obsession with the song Lollipop by Mika. But, instead, I just really want to ramble on about Erika.

Anyone who knows me well knows that I'm...awkward. (According to McKenna I'm not shy. Just awkward.) So making friends isn't something that I feel like comes...naturally to me. Not that I'm like anit-social, but it often times takes a wee bit for me to get close to somebody. Something about Erika just...clicked. For example. She came over to the apartment one night - there were a few other people over too. My roommates invited her to running with them the next morning. I somehow got roped into running also. So, we went running. When we got back, everyone left to go to work and stuff, except me and Erika. She ended up staying for like an hour and we just...talked. (remember how I never do that? Not normal.)

So. let me tell you a bit about Erika. She's a little bit crazy. That's ok. I am too. She's silly. She makes me laugh SO much. She's easy to talk to. She's one of the sweetest girls I know. She thinks about others. She's a little self-conscious at  times, which makes me want to just shake that nonsense out of her and tell her how amazing she is. And she has a brother that just got off his mission and plays the piano...

Why am I telling you all of this? Well...I had an experience last night. I for some reason was just feeling...crappy. Blue. Glum. For no reason. Usually there's a reason. I usually I can shake it. But I couldn't. I hate that feeling. I just didn't know what to do. But then Erika did the most simple thing ever. She was at the apartment next door and came to invite me to hang out with them. Just...super simple. Smallest of gestures. Wasn't that hard. But...it changed my night. When I went back home to go to bed, I had a realization.

There's a reason why I liked Erika right off the bat. She is so close to the Savior. She exemplifies Him.  For whatever reason, the Lord felt it necessary to cause our paths to cross, and it makes me feel so lucky to be able to cross paths with an amazing daughter of God like her. And there's so many other people like her up here. I'm so grateful to Heavenly Father for putting me up here at this time, for leading me, for allowing me to meet so many amazing people in such a short amount of time. It's been a life changing month. Yes. It's been a month and 6 days since I've been up here...crazy. But, yes. Literally life changing. For the better! And a lot of that has to do with the people around me.

So, moral of the story: not just that Erika is amazing, but you are amazing. I'm sure Erika isn't like "Let's see if I can make Beth think I'm AWESOME!" No. She's being herself, and that is how she is making a difference in my life - and in the world. So, just be you, my friends. You never know just who you are impacting simply by being yourself.

Man. I am SO lucky. I'm just loving life right now. Yes, there's stress and frustrations...but it's still great. Love it.

Eh...meh.

I feel like I should do a post...but I have no clue what to write. There's either lots of stuff going through my mind or nothing at all. Right now, it's the nothing at all. And if I wait until there's lots, then it will just be difficult to get it out of my head and into actual words. So...this might be random. And just a hodge-podge of stuff.

I got my AP scores! And I got a 5 on my psych test. Which is really the only one that I truly, truly cared about. No psych 101 for me! And it's a slight jump start on my major. And it makes me happy. I also managed to get a 5 on my government test. Which either means I'm super awesome at bs-ing or other people are really bad at bs-ing. I got a 4 on my English test...which IS good. But I was hoping for 5s across the board. Especially how much I worked my butt of in that class and stressed over everything. BUT, since I managed to get a high enough score on my ACT test, I'm in English 205, just like I would be if I got a 5 on the AP test. Tender mercies of the Lord, eh? Interesting to notice how the Lord knows what goes/will go on, and helps things to happen.

I've been reading this book that Sis. Rainwater, a previous young women president gave me for a graduation present. I've been reading it on and off, and today, I finished it. It's incredible, let me tell you. It's called The Promise of Enough -Seven Principles of True Abundance. Every time I started to read it again, it would tell me something I needed to hear - or even, a few times, when I liked something so much and would share it with someone, it was what they needed to hear. It's a book that anyone can benefit in reading. Really, the only difference between who has abundance and who doesn't...is the person. It has nothing to do what the Lord is giving us. Because it's our attitude, our actions, our gratitude, or whatever, that determines how much we actually see that the Lord does for us - when we reach contentment, then we see all that the Lord really has given us. And contentment is pretty much a choice, a state of mind.

Another little book that has been on my mind, is One Bright Shining Hope. I gave it to a friend at the end of school...it has helped me so much. It's a compilation of quotes by Gordon B Hinckley, specifically for women.  It has given me a boost to my confidence when I was feeling low, it gave me hope when I needed light. It has helped give me a conviction of my place in this world, as a woman. And...that's part of the reason why I gave it away. It's like that one Muppet's Christmas movie, when they find the Fraggles, and then they give the rock away and sing that song. "If you like it, duh-duh duh, pass it on!" I wanted to share that with someone. Sometimes I find myself missing that little book...but I wouldn't even consider changing the fact that I gave it away. The very fact that I miss it means that I have learned and grown from it. Maybe sometime in the future, I'll buy myself another copy. But for now, I'll be content with what I have learned from it.

The Lamb of God. A production by Rob Gardner. I've been listening to it today. It's been a little while since I've listened to it. I love it SO much. The past few weeks up here in Flagstaff, I've had a reminder of the power of music, and how important it is - and should be- in my life. I don't get to play the piano that often up here. It really affected me at first. And I remember the first time I played while I was up here. Goosebumps like crazy. It. Felt. So. Good. Indescribable. And then I've been playing the guitar a little bit more often than usual (except for this week...) and every time I do it, it puts a smile on my face. And then, listening to this Lamb of God music, I feel the Spirit so strong. I'm reminded of things of Christ. Of how I should be. Music plays an important role in my life. It reaches me in a way that mere words seldom can. I express myself in a way that often times I could never do. If you haven't listened to this music, change that! Please!

One last random thing. I was with a group of people - play Apples to Apples. It was asked who the youngest was, to see who would start. I said it probably was me...I got some funny looks. They asked me my birthday, and then how old I was. I said I was 18. Shocked looks. And then I was told that I looked like I was 21. I don't think I look like I'm my sister's age...maybe we're secretly twins? Everyone swears we look exactly alike...which we don't.

Mesa time!

So. I had a grand old time the past few days. My sister and brother in law took a trip down to Mesa for the weekend, and I went with them. I don't know the next time I'll get the chance to go down there, so I made sure that I saw lots of people. Not everyone...because that would be impossible. It is summer after all, and 4th of July, so people are bound to be out of town. Or busy. But, I saw many friends. And I was/is happy.

So, I get to my house Friday night. One of the first things I do? Check the pantry. for what? Goldfish. And what do I see? Goldfish. My parents love me!

Saturday, Marina Mason and Danielle Driggs come over.We have pizza and play games. 'Twas a blast. Good memories of junior staff. Then that night, Tiffany Hakes invites me to go play volleyball with her sisters/friends. I'm not much of a volleyball player...but I was super excited. So I went and saw people that I wasn't even planning on seeing...and even kinda expected to never see again in my life. Just because that's how life goes.

Sunday was devoted to family. At church I was able to talk to some old leaders. They always put a smile on my face. And then that night there was a BBQ. My brother did it as a Father's Day gift. I was included merely  for the reason that I was staying there and needed food.

Monday, I had a little get-together with just a few choir friends. We played some games. (Curses is the most epic game you will ever play. Especially if you play with the right people.) Then there was another family BBQ.  Which Kylie Walker went to. (I had jokingly invited her when trying to make plans, and she really wanted to come. I don't understand why...because my family is nuts. I'm afraid she will never look at me the same way again.)

And today. Tuesday. My sister and brother in law kept pushing the time back for when we were leaving. Which I was ok with. I went to an early-ish lunch with Holly, Kristina, and Kylie and then ended up going to Namebrand Exchange afterwards. Then, I went over to McKenna's house. I went over there for the purpose of having an...intervention. Because I'm pathetic. (don't ask questions. because it's silliness really.) But then I ended up staying there for...like over three hours, just talking. I'm not gonna lie, but that might have been the highlight of my stay. My visit was impromptu and we just...talked. That doesn't happen very often with me. I generally need to have things planned in advanced. And I'm a really bad conversationalist/can't get the thoughts in my head out of my mouth the way I want. So I rarely just sit and talk. But I loved it.

Yes. I had such an amazing time.But it was definitely time for me to come back to Flagstaff. I even started missing it a bit. Especially it's weather. Mesa is SO hot! And humid. And...blech. But Flagstaff's weather is wondrous right now. As are the people. Just as amazing as the people back in Mesa.